This section was prompted by a broadcast I heard by Ravi Zacharias. He made the wondeful suggestion to take a look at our “God” stories, and see how the Lord brought each one about. He began by telling some of his own stories, how “this couldn’t have happened unless that happened first,” story after story.
It’s good to review the major stories of one’s life, because we often forget all the Lord had to to in order to bring each story about.
Take the time to review your stories. You will surprise yourself as you consider just how present and active God has been in your life. Then write the stories down and share them. He deserves to have his wondrous deeds made known.
Presently under construction!
A voice came to me saying, “Doesn’t it say that if the Son of God has set you free, then you are free indeed? Then if you really are free, you can drink just like other free people, can’t you?”
I thought hours on that. It seemed reasonable to me. Was I really free or wasn’t I? And if I was, why couldn’t I drink and keep it in control? I asked my husband what he thought. He couldn’t offer an argument against it. I asked my sister, and neither could she. So I decided to give it a try.
I would start at my cousin’s wedding in a few days. My husband agreed to let me drink from his glass so I wouldn’t be noticed with a drink in my own hand.
And immediately, back I went into captivity.
I would now spend the next 17 months in agony like I had never known. It didn’t take me long to realize I had been tricked. Satan had used Scripture to trick me. Within days, I was in greater captivity to alcoholism than I had ever been even just before my deliverance in 1974.
I began to cry out to God for mercy, and for another deliverance. I came to him time after time after time acknowledging my drunkenness as sin. I admitted that I didn’t really want to be away from alcohol because it dulled the pain so, but was convicted about drunkenness by the Word so in agreement with the Word I asked to be set free.
Sun, 19th, 1976
I woke up thinking about Shadrach and Meshach.
Later, at the prayer meeting at the Binette’s, THAT very Scripture passage was read from Daniel 3.
In rereading it later, the part that stood out was that a 4th person was in the furnace – Jesus.
My Conclusion: I believe God was telling me I was to go through the Fiery Furnace, and that Jesus would be with me THROUGH it, and would bring me out with no damage done.
(If only I had known, I couldn’t have imagined it….) But the Scripture held true!
I went along with Elie and Van and some others to a Christian conference in Kansas City. This was the first time I had the thrill of flying on a large plane, which had been a desire of my heart from my early teen years. I was so thrilled I could hardly contain myself.
This was a chartered flight and we were assigned seats. When I went to my seat, I found that I had been assigned an aisle seat. What a bitter disappointment! I said to the Lord, “You provided this wonderful trip for me, and you could have provided a window seat too. You know, many people don’t care about that, and you know how very much it means to me. I don’t understand.”
The answer was, “Stop complaining and praise me.” So I got ahold of myself, and forced myself to praise him, thinking he must have a reason for me to sit here.
And then, when I was praising him, the pilot came over the loudspeaker and said, “Now that you’re all seated and accounted for, if anyone would like to change seats, you may.” And there was Elie, sitting many rows behind me, waving and calling out, “Paula, I have a window seat, do you want it?!!!”
June 29, 1976 Inner Healing
Elie and Van came over to pray for me. They came against morbidity. I began to hear a wailing from deep within me, a long wailing crying. Several days previously, while listening to a tape on inner healing, I had felt something inside want to cry. At the time, it wouldn’t, but I continued to feel that urge to cry. Now, the wailing went on inside. A baby’s crying, then screeching with violent jumping around inside me.
Then it became a baby’s lonely whimpering. Then I “saw” Jesus rocking me, out on an open porch. I was content, carefree. It was quite emotionless. I was laying in his arms playing normally as a child would. It was natural. The scene sitting in his lap and playing nearby, jumping rope then going for a hug, a kiss, then playing again. I was clean. In a dress, hair neatly combed. There was no yearning for love. It was all so natural, so comfortable.
Comment: We are strongly cautioned against trying to make something like this happen. Dabbling in efforts to do so are tantamount to fooling around with the area of the “psychic” and is forbidden. When it’s God, it just happens with no effort on our part, and almost always unexpectedly.